By Terry Sheridan
This is usually a very hard decision to make. The boss or your manager is driving you insane, and here it is Monday morning and you are faced with the tightening in your stomach with dread over what will happen in the coming week. Changing jobs is a life decision and cannot be made lightly or quickly. Most people have financial responsibilities that they are committed to, and leaving the job will put those at real risk. Perhaps you have found another job already, but how will you know that really you are jumping from the frying pan into the fire? All of these facts are enough to make anyone worried sick, so it is time to sort out what to do. Follow these steps to help you make a good decision. It all boils down to sorting out the main reason why you are wanting to leave. Here are some examples of why you wish to depart from your role.
Communication problems
There are a number of possibilities: it could be the lack of communication from your manager, or perhaps there is too much communication or even that there is enough communication but of the wrong sort. For instance, barking orders rather than asking politely, is a good example of the wrong sort of communication. Aggression is not to be tolerated.
Lack of resources to do your job properly
It is your manager's job to ensure that there are enough resources for you to fulfil your duty statement, we are not talking about arguments here if you have been asking for the latest software version for your computer, we are referring to the resources of enough staff around you to fulfil your tasks without driving up hours of overtime, enough equipment etc..
Poor work ethics and culture
This is a serious problem as the most senior manager in the business is responsible for this. It is his or her task to ensure that the right cultural tone prevails. Leadership is at the top, and if you are suffering from poor leadership, then problems like this will inevitably occur.
Not being paid enough for your job
There can be a long history to this that is not of your making, for instance the last incumbent in the role undervalued their contribution to the organisation. Non profit organisations (NPOs) are notorious for underpaying their people, based on the premise that by working for the NPO is doing your bit for the community. Nice if you can afford it, but in today's climate that is not often the case if you have dependents relying on you.
Lack of respect to you
A deep cultural problem can be discrimination in the workplace, which shows a basic lack of respect for you and others, especially if you are of a different ethnicity, culture or gender. Leaving is an option that must be considered with this problem, as it is hard to turn around the cultural tone of a workplace on your own.
This is only a short list, but covers many people's areas of dissatisfaction with their work role and fuels the fire of discontent within. Browsing through job ads starts to happen, complaining to family or friends about what is happening is a sign that the situation could become explosive and you will leave.
What we are trying to do here is to avoid the sudden resignation, it is absolutely in your interests to keep going, try all the steps below and if that fails then consider your options. Bottling up the work pressures are debilitating for yourself and close ones. Sooner or later the anger will explode and if you do this at work, you are likely to get fired if you stayed on. Anger will not help you at all. Deep consideration and reflection will.
Step 1: Find out if others make the same complaint of this manager?
There are many steps to conflict resolution, but these are the ones that must be taken for yourself to understand what is going on. First of all, do others suffer the same as you? Listen to what is said around you. Who else is complaining of the same problem and why? There is something important to understand when it comes to assigning who is the problem. If a person receives the same criticism from everyone, then it is quite likely that that problem is valid. If a person receives diverse criticism, for instance each complainer has a totally different take on what the problem is, then it is very likely not a valid problem but a projection of each individual's own difficulties in the workplace. For instance, how often have you seen someone criticise another say for not planning, and the critic is the very person who does things hopping from one thing to another without any strategic thought? This is a good case of projection. If a circle of protesters gather round a senior manager all citing different reasons beware, you could just be unwittingly be pulled into a mobbing, that is bullying upwards. This is neither fair to the manager in question or respectful, so stay away. However, after doing your research around the corridors and you hear the same thing is being reiterated, then likely it is a justifiable difficulty with the manager concerned.
Step 2: Are you are the only complainant?
What if you are the only one that has this complaint about the boss or executive? This requires further analysis. First of all a case of projection must be ruled out. Are you as guilty of the same error that you are criticising? Ask yourself honestly here. If you have close ones, friends or family, you can ask for their opinion. "Do you think I am a good planner?" is going to get a "Yes", so ask differently: "In terms of planning things, how do I rate?" is likely to get a more honest answer. If the replies are not what you wanted to hear, this is the time to take it on board and really evaluate if the answer is accurate and thank the person for giving you this excellent feedback. Now fix your own problem. It can be guaranteed that if it is your problem, that the manager who is 'unable to plan' will disappear as a problem to you and not annoy you so much.
Step 3: Does this problem remind you of your childhood?
Another area of reflection could be: Does this manager replicate something from your childhood? For instance, one of your parents could have been authoritarian, and to hear your boss saying to you "It's my way or the highway!" will drag up those memories. Seek out some professional help here, as this area may have to be counselled, a quick visit will soon verify if this is the case. A good counsellor will give you strategies on how to deal with this reverberation from your childhood and gradually the problem with your manager will gradually disappear.
Step 4: Undertake a grievance procedure
After all this consideration you are convinced that the problem really does rest with the manager, it is time to take up your grievance with your upline management. It has to be done fairly and to the point. As stated earlier it is management's job to ensure that you are given the right resources. If there are no changes out of this process after a couple of months, then it is certainly time to consider leaving - as you are dealing with an inflexible organisation. And as always, my advice is to never give your resignation until you have the next job offer in writing in your hand. The purpose of that advice is to ensure that you will not end up unemployed. Three months of unemployment labels you as unemployable, which has to be avoided at all costs.
Careful deliberation and taking these above 4 steps will help you make the right decision to stay or leave your place of employment. There is no reason for you to stay if the situation is untenable for you, but again, a job in hand must be gained first before you make the final irrevocable decision.
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